Yes, I look scarily excited to be manning this whale harpoon. Truth is, when we first pulled into the parking lot, I just thought it was some sort of military gun. Duh. I’m an idiot. Anyway, Norwegian whalers use harpoons with explosive heads that cause instantaneous death 80 percent of the time. The unlucky whales who don’t die immediately get dispatched with a rifle. I’m not justifying the practice, folks, I’m just relaying information about the industry.